I have two sisters, one is 20, the other 21. I get on quite well with them, a lot better now we are older. You do see in films that people's sisters are either their best friends or they are constantly in competition with each other, I have experienced both not one or the other.
Your sisters know things about you that even your friends probably don't know and that level of trust can be on very thin ice.
I would love for my sisters to be my best friends. I know that they are there for me in times of need, a shoulder to cry on but I cannot imagine revealing my deepest secrets to them. Mainly because they will use it against me, even if they don't mean to, in a heated arguement it gets thrown in your face just for it to be instantly regretted.
Due to their similar ages my sisters are pretty much constantly in competition with each other. Be it hair straighteners, jobs or bags, if one gets a better one you can guarantee the other will get the same. It can be frustrating to watch but to be honest I just glad I am not involved.
You do have to wonder though if you were not sisters would you be friends? It is almost when you are at school some friends you only have really because you are at school and once you leave you lose contact, and it is quite similar with sisters, you are thrown together with your siblings as you kind of have to get on.
I love my sisters, but I do think having two similar in age is not ideal, especially when they decide that you are the weaker one in the pack and descend on picking on you, not fun. It is nice having two friends that I can do stuff with, but sometimes I can't help but think if they weren't my sisters I don't they would be my friends. It may sound like an awful thing to say and I wouldn't change them for the world. But we only have some things in common.
Your sister can be your harshest critic but also your saviour in times of need, I just know that as much as I can't stand to be around them I love them and wouldn't be without them.
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Wednesday, 4 January 2012
Saturday, 14 May 2011
'Once a cheater, always a cheater.' Rachel - Friends
Due to the amount of stories recently about lying cheating scumbags it got me thinking about cheating.
It seems now that cheating has got a whole lot easier. For the rich and famous they can pick someone up, treat them mean, dump them, then get a super injunction to stop them ever revealing details on the affair. These people seem to think that with fame comes power and the excuse to do what they want and get away with it. I think this has instilled a sense that you can cheat and its fine, the partner's forgive and they return to normal life not facing any consequences.
The emergence of social networks has meant that the fine lines of cheating have been blurred, before a kiss or more was considered cheating, but now due to Facebook, Twitter and mobile phones cheating has become cyber.
Who can forget Vernon Kay's sexting or Jason Manford getting and sending rude messages via twitter. It seems to some that if there is no physical contact then surely it cannot be cheating, but it does make you think if you found out your partner was sending stuff like that wouldn't you feel hurt? confused? and embarrassed? It's hard is an affair of the mind worse than the flesh? I think sometimes it can be as flesh can be a physical thing but mind is a deeper level and is more about emotions.
Cheating though is cheating, if you are entertaining thoughts of being with someone else other than your partner that is cheating, especially if you make it obvious and actually voice them outside of you head.
It relates to trust I think, you want to think you are your partner's one and only and the thought of them thinking those types of thoughts about someone else just makes your guts churn.
Social networking has been blamed for a lot. For the decline in face to face conversation and the need to be friends with everyone, even those people who you hated but you keep them just to be nosey. I just think as well that social networking allows people to meet people that they wouldn't usually get the opportunity to meet. It also can give a false security, whereas someone might not have the confidence to approach someone in a club it is very easy to face rejection when its a friend request or instant message.
It can make it hard for any sane woman, just too much to compete with I suppose. But lets not fret there are good people out there who are faithful and trustworthy.
It seems now that cheating has got a whole lot easier. For the rich and famous they can pick someone up, treat them mean, dump them, then get a super injunction to stop them ever revealing details on the affair. These people seem to think that with fame comes power and the excuse to do what they want and get away with it. I think this has instilled a sense that you can cheat and its fine, the partner's forgive and they return to normal life not facing any consequences.
The emergence of social networks has meant that the fine lines of cheating have been blurred, before a kiss or more was considered cheating, but now due to Facebook, Twitter and mobile phones cheating has become cyber.
Who can forget Vernon Kay's sexting or Jason Manford getting and sending rude messages via twitter. It seems to some that if there is no physical contact then surely it cannot be cheating, but it does make you think if you found out your partner was sending stuff like that wouldn't you feel hurt? confused? and embarrassed? It's hard is an affair of the mind worse than the flesh? I think sometimes it can be as flesh can be a physical thing but mind is a deeper level and is more about emotions.
Cheating though is cheating, if you are entertaining thoughts of being with someone else other than your partner that is cheating, especially if you make it obvious and actually voice them outside of you head.
It relates to trust I think, you want to think you are your partner's one and only and the thought of them thinking those types of thoughts about someone else just makes your guts churn.
Social networking has been blamed for a lot. For the decline in face to face conversation and the need to be friends with everyone, even those people who you hated but you keep them just to be nosey. I just think as well that social networking allows people to meet people that they wouldn't usually get the opportunity to meet. It also can give a false security, whereas someone might not have the confidence to approach someone in a club it is very easy to face rejection when its a friend request or instant message.
It can make it hard for any sane woman, just too much to compete with I suppose. But lets not fret there are good people out there who are faithful and trustworthy.
Saturday, 16 April 2011
Is honesty the best policy?
When you ask your friend have I put on weight? If you are asking you know you have but when they say yes it feels like being punched in the face.
If you ask your partner do you think she's fit? And he says yes you want to slap him and he can't understand why you aren't talking to him for the next couple of hours.
We may ask the questions but do we really want to know the answers? It does beg the question if people are honest by nature? It is fair easier to lie sometimes then it is to tell the truth. A friend asks of her new boyfriend do you think he's good looking? In your head you are screaming NOOO! but the words that come out of your mouth are along the lines of 'he is attractive not my type though.'
When I say lies I mean the little white lies that get you through not the big fat black ones that end of hurting the people you love. Your sister asks if you think her hair makes he look like a drag queen, you say no but inside you are thinking a little.
If you are not sure if you want to be with your partner anymore and you ask your friend for their opinion, you don't want them to go on a hour rant about how they hate him and how they hate men in general. You want the PC version which weights up both views of the argument.
Is honesty the best policy? If your friend looks like a state before they go out it is your duty to tell her because you know when other girls see you looking fab and her looking a state, they think you are a bitch for letting her go out like that.
I do think there is a fine line between being brutally honest and telling the truth. One I suppose means someone will be upset whereas the other means you craft it in a way that means you tell them not necessarily what you want to hear but a version of it. I think boys have got it right, they are honest but in a way that means they don't cause offense whereas girls seems to swing between bitch or not upfront.
I think personally, get the balance, little white lies when you need to, brutal honesty when they need it. But be kind people!
If you ask your partner do you think she's fit? And he says yes you want to slap him and he can't understand why you aren't talking to him for the next couple of hours.
We may ask the questions but do we really want to know the answers? It does beg the question if people are honest by nature? It is fair easier to lie sometimes then it is to tell the truth. A friend asks of her new boyfriend do you think he's good looking? In your head you are screaming NOOO! but the words that come out of your mouth are along the lines of 'he is attractive not my type though.'
When I say lies I mean the little white lies that get you through not the big fat black ones that end of hurting the people you love. Your sister asks if you think her hair makes he look like a drag queen, you say no but inside you are thinking a little.
If you are not sure if you want to be with your partner anymore and you ask your friend for their opinion, you don't want them to go on a hour rant about how they hate him and how they hate men in general. You want the PC version which weights up both views of the argument.
Is honesty the best policy? If your friend looks like a state before they go out it is your duty to tell her because you know when other girls see you looking fab and her looking a state, they think you are a bitch for letting her go out like that.
I do think there is a fine line between being brutally honest and telling the truth. One I suppose means someone will be upset whereas the other means you craft it in a way that means you tell them not necessarily what you want to hear but a version of it. I think boys have got it right, they are honest but in a way that means they don't cause offense whereas girls seems to swing between bitch or not upfront.
I think personally, get the balance, little white lies when you need to, brutal honesty when they need it. But be kind people!
Sunday, 23 January 2011
Is there such a thing as an easy relationship?
Relationships are hard, people say that if they are meant to be it will be easy, but this is not always the case. When two people from different lives come together, there are bound to be (at some point) tensions. No matter how compatible you feel you are, there will be times when you get stressed and take it out on that one person who you wish you didn't.
When I say relationships, I don't just mean those between you and your partner, but those with your friends and family. Every relationship has to have time spent on it, building up a trust and code that only you two know. It needs time to grow and you have to make an effort. They need to know that you will be there in their time of need and in return they will be there for you.
I think sometimes, people put more time and effort into their friendships as friends you don't always see. Whereas your partner you sometimes take for granted, as you assume they will always be there, but like friends these people are with you by choice and can leave whenever they want.
Recently I have come to appreciate the relationships in my life.
I have been with my boyfriend for over 5 years and recently it has been a little tense. Mainly because we were both thinking the same thing but not willing to be the one to bring it up. We had started taking each other for granted and not appreciating what we have. However, after a shaky, not very well thought out 'confrontation' we had the opportunity to talk it out and things have changed for the better. We have recaptured that feeling we had when we first met, the romance, the excitement and the new-ness, that makes me feel like I did when we first started seeing each other. Not only that we have opened the honesty door and feel we can say anything without fear of upsetting each other.
Due to the shaky, not very well thought out 'confrontation', I have come to appreciate a lot more my wonderful friends. My group of close knit girl pals came to my rescue with pizza, glee and words of comfort that made me think how great they are and how lucky I am to have them. I also got to see new friends in a new light, that really helped being able to talk to someone a little on the outside that was able to give amazing advice.
Like all things in life relationships need to be nurtured and you have to appreciate that you have to make time for the special people in your life. Who knows when you will need them or when they will need you.
When I say relationships, I don't just mean those between you and your partner, but those with your friends and family. Every relationship has to have time spent on it, building up a trust and code that only you two know. It needs time to grow and you have to make an effort. They need to know that you will be there in their time of need and in return they will be there for you.
I think sometimes, people put more time and effort into their friendships as friends you don't always see. Whereas your partner you sometimes take for granted, as you assume they will always be there, but like friends these people are with you by choice and can leave whenever they want.
Recently I have come to appreciate the relationships in my life.
I have been with my boyfriend for over 5 years and recently it has been a little tense. Mainly because we were both thinking the same thing but not willing to be the one to bring it up. We had started taking each other for granted and not appreciating what we have. However, after a shaky, not very well thought out 'confrontation' we had the opportunity to talk it out and things have changed for the better. We have recaptured that feeling we had when we first met, the romance, the excitement and the new-ness, that makes me feel like I did when we first started seeing each other. Not only that we have opened the honesty door and feel we can say anything without fear of upsetting each other.
Due to the shaky, not very well thought out 'confrontation', I have come to appreciate a lot more my wonderful friends. My group of close knit girl pals came to my rescue with pizza, glee and words of comfort that made me think how great they are and how lucky I am to have them. I also got to see new friends in a new light, that really helped being able to talk to someone a little on the outside that was able to give amazing advice.
Like all things in life relationships need to be nurtured and you have to appreciate that you have to make time for the special people in your life. Who knows when you will need them or when they will need you.
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